Since posting "Marci" I have received many comments and suggestions about Marci
and about what I should do. Because of this response I find it necessary to tell
the rest of this story.

At the end of my previous account Marci had left to stay with her sister. As she
left she gave me a note that, I guess was her attempt to apologize and to
explain her actions, which after reading I wanted to throw away. But I couldn't.
The anger and hurt she had caused me made me want to do to the letter what I
wanted to do to her, that is destroy it. But something deep inside me prevented
me.

In The Aftermath

I returned to work the next day and acted as if nothing was wrong. I told no one
that Marci had left or that there was even a problem. That day I sat in my
office with the door closed and tried to understand how any of this could have
happened. I knew Marci better than anyone else in my life.
She had always been honest to a fault and other than lying to me about the night
she sucked that asshole, John Martin's cock in his car there was never any time
that I  ever suspected that she was lying to me. I am still sure that she lied
only the one time. Marci is a kind, caring and generous person. She always had a
kind word for anyone who needed one and was ready to help anyone who needed
help. As a wife Marci was loving and supportive. She had always been there for
me when I needed my spirits lifted or just needed encouragement. She was also my
best friend.

Quite often friends would as me to stop after work for a drink but I seldom did
because I would rather go home to Marci and she was always there when I got
home. Marci's job was closer to home so she was able to do whatever shopping was
needed and be home before me. So you see there was nothing in the last four
years that would have prepared me for what I witnessed in my bedroom the night
before.

That day I got nothing done and I slipped out of the office early and went home.
I got my bottle of Marker's Mark from the liquor cabinet and sat down with the
intention of drinking myself unconscious. As I felt the comfortable warmth of
that wonderful Kentucky bourbon spread as I swallowed my first big gulp it
occurred to me that I was at a cross road. I could continue on the path I was
on, one of anger and self pity, and probable ruin my health and my career or I
could take a different path and deal with things as they come. I finished my
drink and put the bottle away.

For the next two weeks I tried to keep my mind on my work. I was able to do this
for maybe two hours at a time but something would always remind me of the pain I
was in. For instance, I had been reviewing a customer proposal for a collegue
and I wanted to write a note on the proposal for the author. I reached for the
pen in my desk set and as I picked it up I remembered that the desk set was a
gift from Marci for my last promotion. I sat back and let the memory of that day
wash over me. When my boss told me that I was being promoted to senior account
analyst and would get my own office I called Marci with the exciting news. She
seemed excited too, until I said I wanted to go out and celebrate that night.
Then Marci's tone changed, "We'll see."

On my way home that evening I was feeling a little deflated by Marci's response.
When I walked into the house I was even more disappointed. Marci was in the
kitchen putting dishes in the dishwasher and she was wearing an old beat up
sweat suit. I asked her, "Aren't we going out to dinner?"

She said, "Why?"

"To celebrate my promotion. Did you forget about that already?" I responded with
a little anger starting to show.

She turned to walk toward the refrigerator and said, "Oh, that. I thought we
celebrate that at home with..." she opened the refrigerator and pulled out two
of the biggest lobsters I have ever seen. "these. Is that okay? Why don't you go
sit and I'll fix you a drink, then I'll get dinner started. When Marci brought
me the drink she handed me a beautifully wrapped gift box. When I opened the box
it contained a gold Cross pen and pencil desk set. As I looked at the gift Marci
said, "That should look nice on your new desk."

I said, "Thanks Hon. When I talked to you on the phone I got the impression that
you didn't think my promotion was any big deal."

"Well, as soon as you told me about the promotion I started thinking of how to
celebrate. I quickly decide to cook you a nice dinner and get you a nice gift
but I wanted it to be a surprise so I acted like I didn't care...." Marci came
over to my chair and bent over taking my face in her hands and kissed me on the
mouth. "I am so proud of you." Then Marci went back into the kitchen.

When Marci called me for dinner she told me we were going to eat in the dinning
room instead of the kitchen. So I asked her as I look at her old sweat suit, 
"Aren't you a little underdressed for dinner in the dinning room. Aren't going
to get dressed for dinner?"

Marci said, "No. Actually I was thinking of getting undressed for dinner." Then
she removed her sweats. Marci was now standing in front of my wearing just a
black bra and panty set with black thigh high stockings. I got an erection
almost immediately.

I reached for her but she backed away and waved her finger at me and said, "No
touching me until you eat your dinner."

After dinner I went over to Marci and stood behind her chair. I leaned over the
back of her chair and kissed her on the neck and thanked her for a wonderful
meal. Then I cupped her black satin covered breasts in my hands and brought my
face close to hers and she turned to face me and we kissed. Then the passion
took over. As I stood next to her chair Marci opened my pants and pulled my cock
out. I was already erect and Marci commented, "I see Mr. Happy is ready." Then
she ran her tongue over the head and slowly took me into her mouth.

As I sat in my office and remembered this I started to rub my growing erection.

Marci bobbed her head up and down on my cock for a few minutes then she stopped
and asked, "Does this feel good?"

When I responded in the affirmative Marci said, "Why don't we go up to bed now
so we can take care of each other." Then suddenly my beautiful memory was
shattered and replaced with the image of Marci on the floor with John Martin's
cock in her hand and hearing Marci say, "I want you to suck on my cunt. I want
you to make me cum."

That's the way things went for a while. So many things would remind me of Marci.
Something in my office or something I would hear some one say would remind me of
her and what ever fond memory it would recall would quickly be replaced by the
sights and sounds of the night I watched her acting the willing slut with that
creep.

At the end of that first two weeks my boss called me into his office. I was half
expecting him to give em a negative review of my recent work performance but
instead he asked me to attend a week long seminar in Rolling Meadows, Illinois
the following week.  I was glad to go. It would get me out of town and maybe
give me something other than Marci to think about.

On Sunday evening I checked into the Marriott Hotel and settled into my room. I
spent the evening reading the class agenda and session descriptions then I
watched a movie on HBO and went to bed at 10:30 PM. Monday was a good day for
me. There were several people in the class that I knew from other classes or
business meetings. The seminar was interesting and I was able to concentrated on
the presentations and keep my mind from wandering back to Marci. That evening I
went out for dinner and drinks with some of my class mates then went back to the
hotel to sleep. Tuesday had gone pretty much as Monday had until I got back to
the hotel after dinner.

As I sat at the desk in my room trying to read my e-mail I kept thinking about
Marci. "How could she have done this to us?"  I had to do something so I decided
to call her. I opened my brief case and got my address book to get Marci's
sister's phone number. As I set the address book down and picked up the phone to
dial a business card fell out of my address book and dropped to the floor. As I
picked the card up off the floor I noticed the Schaumburg, Illinois address. I
looked at the care then dropped it into my brief case and dialed the phone.

As I heard the phone ring for the third time I felt butterflies in my stomach. I
wasn't sure what I was going to say if she answered the phone.  I had almost
decided to hang up when I heard her voice, "Hello."

"Hi. Is this Janice Martin?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"This is Ben Rogers." There was silence on the other end of the line. "I am
sorry to be calling like this but I was hoping we could talk." Still not a sound
on the other end. "I wanted to tell you how sorry I am for the way I dropped
that bomb on you. I was just so upset and angry that I never thought about how
this would effect you." I listened carefully to try and determine if she was
still on the phone. She was, I could hear her unsteady breathing. I continued,
"I was hoping that maybe we could meet somewhere and talk about what happened."

Janice asked, "Are you calling from work?"

I thought the question strange but answered, "No. I am in Rolling Meadows."

This time when I stopped I heard a man's voice in the back ground, "Who's on the
phone?"

Then I heard Janice say, "It's Debra form work. She wants me to have dinner with
her tomorrow night."

Then to me Janice said, "Where did you want to go for dinner?"

I said, "I am staying at the Marriott." and before I could finish Janice said,
That would be fine. I'll meet you there. So tomorrow night, seven o'clock at the
Outback."

I asked, "You'll meet me at the Marriott?"

"Yes the Outback is fine. I'll see you at seven. Good night."

After I put the phone down I figured that it must have been John I heard in the
back ground. It angered me that he was still with his wife. I would have hoped
that she would have thrown him out. That was something I would have to ask her
about the next night.

Wednesday evening at seven o'clock I was waiting in the lobby of the Marriott
watching for Janice Martin. This wasn't an easy task as there were many women
walking around the lobby and trying to figure out which one was Janice looked
like it was going to be a daunting task.
Then I saw her. I knew it had to be her immediately by the way she came into the
hotel. I could see that she was nervous and that she was obviously looking for
someone. I took a moment to admire her from a distance. She was a very
attractive blonde. She was wearing a pair of black slacks that showed of her
bottom very nicely and a white blouse with one gold chain around her neck.

I approached her and said, "Mrs. Martin?"

"Yes, and you are Ben?"

I said that I was and offered my hand. She placed her small delicate hand in
mine and said, "I am not sure if it would be appropriate to say that I am glad
to meet you. So I'll wait till after our meeting to decide if I am glad or not."

I said, "That's fair. Thank you for coming." I let go of her hand and asked her
if the hotel restaurant would be okay for dinner and Janice said that it would
be fine.
We didn't say anything more until the waitress brought us our drinks. Then I
said, "I presumed
from what I heard on the phone that you and John are still together."

Janice looked at her hands that were wrapped around her wine glass and said,
"Yes, we are still together and whether we stay together depends on you."

I asked what she meant and Janice said, "Let me explain this as best I can. That
night when you called I was very upset. I didn't want to believe what you told
me. After I hung up the phone I realized that I only had the word of some
stranger on the phone that John had cheated on me. I should have asked you to
let me talk to him but I hung up on you instead.  After that I tried to call
John at his hotel and got no answer. Of course that didn't prove anything. I had
to wait until I could talk to John. I decided to wait till John called me to ask
him what was going on but he came home instead. He got home at ten o'clock the
next morning and said that he had finished his business early and caught an
early flight. I asked him what had gone on the night before and John just stared
at me and said that he had no idea what I was talking about. So I told him about
your phone call and he denied everything. He said that he'd never heard of you
and this must have been some sick person's idea of a joke.  I wanted to believe
him but it was difficult. Although I have never caught him cheating on my I have
suspected that he has had flings on various business trips but I managed to
convince myself that unless I had solid evidence that John was cheating I would
assume he wasn't. That allowed me to not have to do anything about it.

"Then a few days ago John and I were at a cocktail party and one of his friends
came over to John and said, 'Boy was the boss pissed that you didn't stay in
Baltimore till the end of that meeting a couple of weeks ago.' I knew then that
John had lied about why he came home early. But I still didn't have enough
proof. So here I am, nearly convinced that my husband cheated on me. Now I am
counting on you to tell me the truth about what happened."

At that moment our meals arrived. I waited till the waiter had left and then I
told Janice everything from the incident four and a half years ago and then
about the phone call I over heard and how I told Marci I would be out of town
and then waited in my car until John showed up. And how I snuck into the house
and watched the two of them having sex. I even told her how I burst in on them
just as John started to climax.

When I had finished I saw a tear running down Janice's cheek. She wiped it away
and said, "I believe you. No one would make up a story like that as a joke. You
said it was four and a half years ago when he took Marci for that ride. Well
four and a half years ago John and I were engaged. So apparently he was cheating
on me even before we got married. I am so sorry this happened to you. If I had
been less naive I might have been able to keep all of this from happening."

I took Janice's hand in mine and said, "This isn't your fault and it isn't mine.
John had the option of not cheating on you and Marci had the option of turning
John down on both occasions. We didn't do anything wrong."

Janice looked into my face and when I looked at her beautiful blue eyes filled
with tears I wondered how that asshole could have cheated on this lovely woman.
Then Janice squeezed my hand and attempted a smile and said,  "Shall we go up to
your room now? I don't know what good it will do but I would like to get some
amount of revenge."

I called the waiter over and settled the bill and took Janice up to my room.

In the room Janice came into my arms and said, "I'll do anything you want but
please be gentle."

I kissed her on the end of the nose and Janice said, "Correction, you can do
anything but that. Don't touch me nose. I don't like that." She wasn't angry but
I could tell she meant what she said as she rubbed the back of her hand across
her nose.

I took her face in my hands and brought my lips to hers and let my tongue brush
across her lips as we kissed. On the second kiss our tongues met. Having this
beautiful woman so close to me had me erect in no time at all and it took all of
my self control to continue to move slowly. I wanted to tear her blouse off but
I open the buttons slowly as I continued to kiss her. Once I had her blouse off
I removed her bra and I cupped her breasts and bent to kiss then. Janice ran her
fingers through my hair as I sucked on her nipples. After I spent several
minutes loving her breasts, Janice lifted my head and kissed me. Then she began
removing my shirt. When she had my shirt off she kissed my nipples and began to
open my pants. When she had my pants opened, Janice pulled them down my legs and
helped me step out of them. Janice then got on her knees and pulled my jockey
shorts off.  She took my cock in her hand and pushed it up against my stomach
then she leaned in and began to run her tongue over  my sack and then sucked as
much of it into her mouth as she could. The feeling of having my sack in her
warm mouth was wonderful. So good in fact that I was worried that I might lose
control. Then Janice ran her tongue up the underside of my shaft and when she
reached the top she took my engorged member into her mouth and began sliding it
in and out of her mouth.  I closed my eyes and just enjoyed the sensations.
Janice brought me close to climax then she removed my cock from her mouth and
stood up. I kissed her and lead her to the bed where I removed her slacks. I sat
her on the edge of the bed and lifted her legs over my shoulders and put my head
between her legs. I pulled the gusset of her panties aside and inserted my
tongue into Janice's hot honey pot and licked and sucked on her until she had an
orgasm.

After that she said, " I want you inside me. I want you to climax inside me and
put your seed as deeply inside me as you can."

Not wanting to disappoint her I pulled her panties off and got on the bed and
moved on top of Janice. I guided my cock to her wet opening and pushed myself
inside. When I had my shaft all of the way in, Janice wrapped her arms and legs
around me and held me in place. The way she was holding me I could only take
short strokes but I was enjoying the feeling anyway. As I started getting close
to my orgasm. Janice began to move her hips making my strokes longer and harder
and then all at once we both climaxed together.  When it was over we both
collapsed on the bed.

We held each other for another half hour then Janice said that she had better
get going. I watched as she got out of bed and started dressing. She put on her
bra and blouse then she picked up her panties and looked at them. Then she threw
the panties to me and said, "Here. Take these to remember me by. When I get home
I am going to undress in front of John and when he asks me where my panties are
I am going to tell him."

I asked, "Are you sure you want to do that?'

She said, "Absolutely! I want him to feel a little of what I have felt every
time I suspected that he cheated on me. Then I will tell him to leave."

When she had her pants on and was ready to leave Janice came over to the bed and
kissed me. Then she said, "Until a new man comes into my life, if you need me I
am here for you. You can come see me or I'll come see you. What ever works out
best. Then she kissed me again and left.

After Janice left I began to feel guilty but I wasn't sure why. Was it because I
cheated on Marci? Even thought Marci and I weren't together we were still
married. Or was I feeling guilty because I took advantage of Janice. Maybe if I
had left her out of this she could have gone on with her life not knowing that
her husband was cheating on her. Now that she knew for sure she would have to
face up to it and do something about it.

I made it through the next two days of class and on Friday evening was packing
to got home Saturday morning when I decided to call Janice to see how she was
doing. I was a little afraid that John would answer the phone but he didn't.
Janice answered the phone and I said, "Hi, it's Ben."

Janice asked if I was all right and I told her that I called to ask her that
same question.

Janice said, "I'm fine. John is gone and I don't feel as bad about that as I
thought I would. I actually feel like a weight has been lifted from me."

"Where did he go?"

"He said he was going to his friends apartment in Chicago but I found out later
that the apartment is actually his. Nights when he said he had to work late he
took his girl friends there."

I asked her how she found that out and Janice said, "One of his old girl friends
told me. As soon as she heard that I had asked him to leave she called me and
told me about the apartment and told me who some of his other girl friends
were."

All I could manage was, "Wow!"  Then I asked, "What happened Wednesday night
when you got home?"

Janice said, "It was really something. When I got home John was in the bedroom
watching television. When I came in he asked me how my dinner with Debra was and
I said, 'I didn't have dinner with Debra.' As I said that I was taking my blouse
off. Then John said 'I thought you said you were having dinner with Debra. Who
did you go to dinner with?'

"Before I answered I removed my slacks. The look on his face when I saw I wasn't
wearing panties was beautiful. He couldn't even speak for a minute then he
finally manage to ask me where my panties were. I said, 'I gave them to Ben as a
souvenir of or evening together.'
"John jumped off the bed and asked, 'Ben Who?'  and I said, 'Ben who do you
think. Ben and I had dinner and talked about you and Marci and then I went up to
his room and we had sex. What do you think of that?' I thought he was going to
go ballistic. He grabbed me and threw me on the bed and said, 'You're lying.
Your just making that up do make me jealous.'

"So I spread my legs and said, 'See for yourself.' He looked at me down there
and saw that it was obvious that I had had sex  He started shouting and calling
me names and I just waited for him to calm down. Then I told him he had no right
to call me names after his behavior and that I thought it would be best if he
moved out of the house. What surprised me the most is that he didn't say another
word. He just packed his bags and left. The next day he sent me an e-mail to
tell me where he was staying."

I said, "Weren't you afraid that he might hurt you?"

Janice said, "No. I figured if he hit me I would call the police on him and have
him arrested."

"Well, I'm sorry that all this happened."

"Don't be. I'm not. I would have thought that I would be devastated if John ever
left me but instead I feel free."

I said, "I have to leave in the morning. I was wondering if you would like to
have dinner with me tonight. This time for us."

Janice said, "Sure. Where?"

"How about the Outback?" I said.

Janice laughed. It was the first time I had heard her laugh. "The Outback would
be fine."

I asked, "Should I pick you up at home or meet you at the restaurant. Either way
I need directions."

I picked Janice up at her house and we went to dinner. After dinner we went back
to her house and we sat and talked about ourselves for an hour or so and then we
made love. This time not for revenge. This time it was for our mutual enjoyment
and nothing more. When I left her house that night I think we both knew that we
weren't in love and probably never would be, but we were friends and that was
enough for me.

When I got back home on Saturday I checked the messages on the answering machine
and there were several  messages from Marci. "Ben I need to talk to you. Please
call me," "Ben, where are you, we need to talk," etc. Each time she left her
sister's phone number. I erased the messages and fixed myself a drink. As I was
drinking and reading the newspaper the phone rang. I almost answered it but then
chose to let the answering machine pick up the call. It was Marci again. She
said, "Ben I have been calling all week. I left several messages at your office
and here. Why aren't you returning my calls? I  know you are very angry with me,
but please let me talk to you."

As soon as she hung up I erased the message. I spent the rest of the day taking
care the things that had accumulated over the last week. Then I went to bed
early. I couldn't sleep. I started thinking about Marci again. I was beginning
to understand my problem now. In spite of what she had done to me, part of me
still loved her. I would start to think that I should take here back then I
would see the image of her in bed with that piece of shit Martin and I would
feel sick. I debated with myself all night about whether I should give Marci
another chance and whether I could ever forget what she did. In the morning I
knew that I was going to have to see Marci and decided what to do based on how I
felt afterward.

Sunday afternoon I called Marci's sister and told her I would be home that
evening if Marci wanted to come by and talk to me.

Marci showed up around seven o'clock.  She didn't look well. She looked like she
had lost weight
and like she hadn't been sleeping well. Somehow that pleased me. I asked her how
she was and she said, "Not very well. I miss you. I want things to be the way
they were before."

I said, "Things can be the way the were before just as soon as you can explain
to me why I shouldn't care about what you did."

"I wish I could do that but I can't. I don't know why that happened. I never
would have believed that I would do that and I am sure I would never do anything
like that again."

"Even if I wanted to believe that it would it would be difficult. Have you
forgotten that you lied about that little blow job you gave shit for brains in
his car a few years ago. You swore to me that you did nothing wrong that night.
Turns out that was either a lie or you don't think sucking another guys cock is
wrong? "

"It was wrong, I know. I tried to explained about that in my note."

"Oh yeah, I remember that, you said that you sucked the asshole's cock so that
you wouldn't have to fuck him. That made a hell of a lot more sense than just
telling that dip shit you weren't going to have sex with him because you were in
love with someone else, or telling the fuck face to take a hike when he asked
you to go for a ride with him in the first place."

"Why do you have to keep calling John names. This wasn't his fault it was mine."

"Oh right. You want to take all the credit for this? Do you know what kind of
person were talking about here? Do you  really know Mr. John Martin? Let me tell
you a little about him. That night when you were sucking Mr. Nice Guy's cock in
his car, when he shot his load in your mouth, did he happen to mention that he
was engaged at the time?"

Marci was looking at her hands as I was talking and  I could tell that the words
I was using were having the desired effect. I could see the shame in her face.
But when I said that the asshole was engaged Macri looked up in surprise. "He
was engaged?" She looked horrified.

I said the fact that he was engaged bothers you more than then fact that you
swallowed his load and lied to me about the whole thing?"

"No. I fell terrible about what I did to you, it just that now I find out we
were hurting someone else too."

"Let me tell you something else about Mr. Wonderful. That night at our house
before you told  him, and I quote, 'I want you to suck on my cunt. I want you to
make me cum' did he mention that he cheated on his wife so frequently that he
had his own apartment in Chicago so he could fuck any little whore he wanted
without his wife finding out. Why would a man intentionally go after another
man's wife? It's not love. This guy claimed to love his wife and with the number
of women he was fucking you couldn't have meant any more to him than another
notch on his belt. But you didn't see through that. You thought that there was
something special between the two of you that was more important than your
marriage. And I don't know if I could ever learn to deal with that."

"Why do you have to repeat those awful things I said? I feel bad enough as it
is."

"No you don't. Until you feel worse than me you won't feel bad enough. I say
these things because I keep hearing them over and over in my head."

Macri asked,, "So where do we go from here? Are you going to ask for a divorce?
I guess I can't blame you if you do."

I said, "I don't know yet. Half of my brain is screaming at me to throw you out
of the house right now and be done with you forever, but the other half is tell
me to go slowly and don't do anything I'll regret later. For now I won't do
anything."

"Are you saying there might be a chance for us to get back together."

"I said I don't know. I have to think about it some more."

"If there's a chance I will do anything to make it work."

I said, "There is something else you should know. I was in Chicago last week and
I got together with Janice Martin. We ended up in bed together. I guess you
could call it revenge sex. I was with her again Friday night only that time it
wasn't for revenge."

I could see that this news made an impact on Marci. She was looking at her hands
again but I saw the tears drip from her eyes. Then without looking up, Marci
said, "Are you in love with her?'

I said, "Of course not. It was just sex and it was great."

Again without looking up, "I guess I deserved that. I better go now. Please call
me and let me know what you're thinking. Just tell me what you want me to do.
What ever you want I'll do it." Marci got up and came over and tried to kissed
me on the cheek, but I pulled away. Then she turned and left.

I managed to get through the first part of the next week without thinking about
Marci very often. Then on Thursday afternoon as I was returning from lunch I saw
a  blue 1993 Camaro in the parking lot at work.  It was nearly identical to my
first car. I had bought it new when I got out of the army in May of 1993. It was
two months later that I met Marci. I started remembering the first time we went
parking together in that car. It was only our second date. I had parked in a
wooded area overlooking the bay and we sat in the car listening to the radio. I
put my arm around her and pulled Marci to me and kissed her. As our necking got
more passionate I began to massage her breasts through her blouse.  This seemed
to get Marci really hot but she wouldn't let me get my hand inside her blouse.
We made out for about an hour then I took Marci home.  As soon as I got home I
had to run into the bathroom and jerk myself off. It wasn't till about our fifth
date that Marci let me get my hand inside her blouse. Her bare breasts felt so
good in my hand and I loved the way her nipples felt on my lips as I sucked on
them. I wasn't sure who was enjoying the sensations more, me or Marci. When I
sucked on her nipples Marci would throw her head back and pull my face tighter
against her chest. Her breathing would get erratic and I thought that she was
near orgasm. When I put my hand on her thigh and started to move it up under her
skirt, Marci squeezed her legs together and told me to stop. She said she
couldn't do that. She told me then that she didn't want to have sex until she
was married. Marci told me that her older sister had gotten pregnant in high
school and she wanted to be sure that she didn't get pregnant before she got
married. I decided to be patient with her because I felt she was worth it. So
our sexual activity in the car didn't progress beyond my sucking on her breasts
until after I finally had sex with her in her apartment a few months later.

As I walked past the Camero in the parking lot remembering those early days in
my relationship with Marci and thinking about what we did and didn't do in my
car I suddenly had the vision of her sucking shit for brains' cock in his car.
Had he been sucking on her tits and got her so hot she couldn't stop him. What
had started as an erotic memory ended with me getting angry again.

I spent the rest of the afternoon trying not to hate Marci. I thought about all
of the fun we had had together over the last four years. Thinking back over that
period there never was a time that I doubted Marci's love for me. Which just
made what happened even harder to understand. That evening and actually late
into the night I went back and forth between what Marci had done to me and the
things that Marci had done for me. On a balance sheet the pros would have far
outweighed the cons but that is only because the balance sheet doesn't account
for the emotional pain caused by the cons. I was fighting an internal battle
over which path I should take. Should I just dump Marci now and forget about all
the good times we had together or should I  attempt to save our marriage. I
wished that there was somebody I could have talked to about all this but I
hadn't told anyone about my marital problems and I wasn't  about to start. By
the time I finally got to sleep I had made up my mind which path to take.

The next day I called Marci at work and asked her to stop by the house that
evening. I told her that I would order a pizza and we could talk. Marci was
waiting for me on the porch when I got home. We went into the house and I called
for a pizza then got a couple of beers from the refrigerator.  Marci and I sat
down in the living room. I couldn't stay seated so I got up and started pacing.
I looked at Marci and said, "I have made a decision about what I want to do. I
want you to listen to what I say before you comment. Okay?" Marci agreed and I
started, I have given this a lot of thought. I have thought about all of the
best things in or relationship and weighted them against the bad. There was
certainly more god than bad by volume but it is easier to forget the good than
it is the bad. I know that I am still in love with you even though at this
moment part of me hates you. It has all come down to me making a decision.
Whether to call us quits and move on or try to save our marriage."

I paused here to take a sip from my beer bottle then continued, "It wasn't easy
but I have decided to try and save the marriage." Marci looked up at me and
although she didn't smile I could see relief in her eyes and I could almost
sense happiness in her. "This doesn't mean that everything will be back to
normal in a couple of days. We have a long way to go. I don't know if this will
work because I don't know if I will ever be able to forgive you for what you
did, and I certainly will never forget it. So you'll have to accept the fact
that for a while I may throw this up to you and get angry all over again.  I
have come up with some conditions that you will have to agree to before we go
any farther.  I want you to move back into the house but not into our bedroom.
You can use any of the other bedrooms. You are not to come into my room
uninvited. If and when I determine the time is right I will ask you to move into
the master bedroom with me".

Just about then the pizza arrived. I paid the pizza delivery girl and told Marci
that we should eat and I would continue listing my conditions after we ate. I
got a couple more beers from the refrigerator and we ate and drank in silence.
When we'd had enough to eat I started pacing again.

"If you come back I will expect you to handle all of the household duties and
chores that were your responsibility before. You will not have visitors in the
house unless I am home. If some one calls you I want to know who called and what
they wanted. When you go out of the house I want to know where you are going,
with who, why, and when you'll get home. You may as well get used to me watching
you very closely.  I know this seems like I am taking all of your privacy away
but it's the only way I can do this until I feel that I can trust you again. It
should go without saying that you are to have no contact with that fuck head
Martin. And if you there is any other man out there that  could have that kind
of effect on you, we may as well just end this thing right now. And as far as
when we might become sexually intimate again, I will decide that when I think
the time is right. Is all that clear? Do you have any questions?"

Marci said, No, I don't have any questions. I think I understand everything."

"Do you think you can accept those conditions?"

Marci looked me directly in the eyes and said, Yes. I'll do what ever is
necessary to save our marriage." Then she lowered her eyes and meekly asked,
"When can I move back home."

I told her she could move back when ever she wanted to. Macri then asked, "If I
go pack up my things right now can I come back tonight?"

I said, "This is your house too, so if you want to come back tonight it's up to
you."

Marci stood up and said, "Thank you for giving me another chance. I will do
anything I have to do to make this work. I am going to get my things and I
should be back in a couple of hours."

As soon as Marci left I sat down and though over what I had just done. I felt it
was the right thing to do but I still wasn't comfortable. I wondered if I ever
would be.

So that night Marci move back into the house. She took over the largest of the
three remaining bedrooms. Her room face the front of the house. Her bathroom was
across the hall from her room. The master bedroom had its own bathroom so the
only time we would be together in the house was when we were down stairs.

We didn't talk to each other much in the first few days but I could see that the
tired look I had seen on her face the first time we talked was gone. Then on the
first Saturday night that she was back Marci had gone to bed early and I went up
around eleven o'clock,  I had just turned off the lights in my room when I heard
Marci's door opened. I opened my door a crack and peeked out in time to see
Marci go into the bathroom. She was wearing just a Tee shirt and panties. I
waited by the door until she finished in the bathroom and headed back to her
room. Seeing her dressed that way, the way she almost always came to bed with
me, I wished that she was getting into bed with me that night. When I got back
in bed I couldn't stop thinking about Marci and that she was just across the
hall. All I had to do was ask her to come over and I was sure she would. But
then the reason she was in the other room came crashing down on me. It made me
angry again. So now I was in bed by myself, angry, and very horny. I don't know
how I arrived at the decision about what I was about to do, I just got out of
bed and went over to Marci's room. I went in and sat on the edge of her bed and
whispered, "Marci, are you awake?"

Marci turned toward me. There is a street light in front of the house and
although Marci's blinds were closed, enough light entered the room that I was
able to see her eyes. Marci said, "Yes. I'm awake. The expression on her face
seemed to be one of hopeful anticipation. She asked, "What do you want?"

I said, "I want you to suck my cock?"

"What?"

"I said I want you to suck my cock."

"You're serious?"

"Of course I'm serious. I need you to suck my cock."

Marci didn't say anything nor did she move so I took her hand and placed it on
my crotch. After another brief period of frozen silence Marci reached her hand
inside my boxer shorts and pulled my semi erect cock out and without a word she
move her head into my lap and took my cock into her mouth. As she work on my
growing member with her mouth I gave her encouragement. "Take it deep. That's
it, Suck that cock. Don't make me cum yet. I want to shove this cock in your
cunt and fuck your brains out."

When me cock was fully erect and getting dangerously close to climaxing I pulled
away form Marci causing her mouth to make a popping noise when my cock pulled
free of her lips. Next I pulled the blankets off her and lifted her tee shirt
up. Then I pusher her legs apart and with my right hand I pulled the crotch of
her panties aside then I laid my cock against her pussy and said, "Put my cock
into your cunt. Rub it on your pussy lips and help me find that fuck hole of
yours."

Marci didn't protest. She reached between us and guided my cock to her opening
and pulled me inside. I pumped her hard and fast. I didn't care if she was
enjoying it or not and I didn't care if it hurt her a little. After all I wasn't
making love to her, I was fucking her.  When I felt that my climax was imminent
I pull my cock out of her pussy and quickly move up the bed and pushed my cock
against Marci's lips. She opened her mouth and took me inside. I started pumping
my cock into her mouth. About half of my cock was in her mouth when I felt the
first spasm. When that first rocket of hot cum hit the back of Marci's throat it
made her choke and she pulled back and my cock fell out of her mouth. I grabbed
myself and stoked my cock through my orgasm. My semen had shot all over Marci's
face, in her hair, and on her pillow.

When my orgasm passed and I wasn't spewing anymore semen, I put my flaccid cock
back in my shorts and went back to my room. When I got into bed I laid there and
listened as Marci
went to the linen closet and got a clean pillow case. Then she went into her
bathroom and got in the shower. I fell asleep before she finished her shower.

The next day Marci didn't come down stairs until after I went out side to wash
my car. While I was washing the car I thought about what I had done to Marci. I
felt a little guilty about the way I treated her but I also felt that I had
gotten a small amount of revenge by treating her as an object rather than a
person. My thoughts for the rest of that day kept going back to my humiliation
of Marci. By the time I got to bed that night I had decided to do it to her
again. I waited till almost midnight then I removed my shorts and went into her
room. This time I didn't say a word I Just sat on the bed. Marci was asleep so I
touched her arm. She jumped a little then sat up and looked at me. I just
pointed at my cock. I could tell she didn't want to do it so I tilted my head as
if to say "Look down there" then when she looked down I pointed to my cock
again. Marci resigned herself to what she had to do and she took my cock into
her mouth again. As I did the night before I made lewd and dirty comments about
what she was doing and what I was going to do to her. This time I made Marci
take her panties off and get on her hands and knees so I could enter her from
behind. When I had myself near orgasm I again pulled out and walked around the
bed and pushed my cock into Marci's face. She took me in her mouth and brought
me to climax and I shot my load all over her face and hair again.

As I left the room Marci dropped down and lay on her stomach. She didn't look at
me as I left.
I closed her door behind me and stood listening for a moment. That's when I felt
the first chink in my armor. I heard Marci crying. It wasn't loud but it was
unmistakable. For the first time I felt really bad about what I had done to her
the last two nights. I was almost tempted to go back in and hold her and tell
her I was sorry, but I didn't.

I didn't see Marci again until the next evening when I got home from work. She
was sitting in the kitchen and I could tell immediately that she had been
crying. She looked up at me as I walked in and she said, "We need to talk."

I said, "Okay,' and sat down at the table with her.

Marci said, "I said I would do anything to save this marriage but I don't think
I can handle the way you treated me the last two nights. Maybe I deserved to be
treated that way after what I did but I can't let you continue to treat me like
an animal. I want to love you and I want you to love me. What has gone on in
this house since I came home has nothing to do with love. It's anger and revenge
on your part and submission on mine. I can't live like this. I have been willing
to abide by all of the conditions you set for me but now I have to set a
condition for you. I will not allow you to treat me that way again. If you hate
me that much just tell me and I'll leave."

I felt terrible. I was being vengeful and I knew that if I really wanted to try
and save our marriage I wouldn't be able to treat Marci that way. I wanted to
apologize but then again I didn't. Instead I looked at Marci and said, "I accept
that condition. It won't happen again.

Over the next month Marci and I lived as normally as we could under the
circumstances. There were no more late night visits to her bedroom. As a mater
of fact there was no sex going on at all.
For a while I had been listening in on her phone calls and checking up on her
any time she left the house other than for work. I finally realized that trying
to watch her every move wasn't going to save our marriage. I was going to have
to trust her. Give her back her freedom and then if she betrays me the marriage
is over. The way things were I didn't have a marriage, I just had a woman living
in my house. So I stopped asking her about her phone calls and I stopped asking
her where she was going every time she left the house and I stopped following
her to see where she actually went.

After that things started getting better around the house. We started to feel
more comfortable around each other and we started talking more. The kinds on
conversations we use to have before all this trouble. We even discussed what we
would like to do on our next vacation. That's when it hit me that we hadn't been
intimate, romantically intimate since before the trouble. It struck me as odd to
be discussing where we would go on vacation together when we didn't even sleep
in the same room. I decided then it was time for me to take the next step. It
was on Friday afternoon that I called Marci at work and asked her if she would
like to go out to dinner with me that evening. She said that she would love to.
I told her to be ready when I got home from work. On the way home from work I
picked up a bouquet of flowers.

When I got home Marci was upstairs so I put the flowers in a vase in the
kitchen. I got a beer from the refrigerator and drank it as I waited for Marci..
When she came down stairs she looked great. She had obviously spent a lot of
time on her hair and make up and she had put on her best spaghetti strap
cocktail dress. It was obvious that Marci understood the importance of this
evening as much as I did. When she walked into the kitchen she looked pretty
pleased with herself. When I told her she looked beautiful, probably the first
compliment I had paid her in the last three months, Marci blushed a deep red.
Then she saw the flowers. She went on and on about how beautiful the flowers
were.

We had a wonderful evening. We had a delightful dinner followed by dancing then
we went for a walk in the park along the bay. When we got home I put a couple of
romantic CDs on the player and poured us some wine. We drank the wine then
started to dance. As we were dancing I kissed Marci on the forehead. She lifted
her head and I kissed her on the nose then on the lips. After a few minutes of
very passionate kissing I stepped back from Marci and asked, "Would you care to
join me in the bedroom?"

She asked, "Will I be staying the night?"

"Yes, and tomorrow night and the next night... I want you to move back into the
master bedroom with me if your ready.'

"I'm ready."

Marci held my hand as we went upstairs. In our room I slowly undressed her and
planted kisses all over her body. When I looked at her naked on the bed, for the
first time since she came back home, I wanted to make love to her. I quickly
stripped off my clothes and joined Marci on the bed. I squeezed, kissed and
sucked on her breasts and nipples until she was practically begging for more
then I kissed my way down over her belly and through her patch of curly dark
brown hair.
As I moved my head between her legs Marci spread them to give me better access.
I ran my tongue over her vulva several times and watched as her petal like lips
opened then I ran my tongue between her lips and pushed it inside Marci's now
very juicy pussy. I locked my lips over her pussy and started flicking my tongue
back and forth across Marci's clitoris. Marci was soon in the throws of a major
orgasm.

Marci turned around in bed so that she could get my cock into her mouth. She
held my sack in one hand gently tickling my balls as she ran her tongue up and
down my rigid shaft occasionally slipping the knob into her mouth. When she had
me nearly crazy she took me deep into her mouth and brought me to the brink of
orgasm then she stopped. She moved up my body to my ear and whispered, "I want
you inside me now."

I rolled on top of her and pressed the head of my cock against her slippery
opening. My cock slid easily into her and it felt wonderful to be back inside
her again. I humped into her for several minutes and was approaching my orgasm
when Marci said, "I want you to cum in my mouth."

I gave her an inquisitive look and she repeated., "I want you to cum in my
mouth."

So, I pulled out of Marci's pussy and rolled onto my back. Marci  crawled over
me and straddled my head with her knees and put her pussy just inches from my
mouth then she lay down on my chest and took my cock into her mouth. As Marci
pumped my cock into her mouth I locked my lips onto her pussy and returned the
pleasure. Suddenly there was a small flow of juices from Marci's pussy telling
me she was having an orgasm. That was all it took to set me off and I exploded
in her mouth. Marci never took her mouth off of my cock will I was ejaculating.
She took everything into her mouth. When it was over Marci climbed off me and I
could see then that she must have swallowed most of my load but there was a
little running down her chin. Marci wiped her chin with the back of her hand and
smiled at me.

I said "What was that all about?"

"I wanted to show you that I would gladly do that for you when we are making
love. I just didn't want you to force me to do that against me will."

I said, "I am sorry I did that to you. I was just so angry then that I was a
little out of control. But I can promise that I will never do that to you
again."

We fell asleep in each others arms.

That night was the major turning point. Our relationship continued to get
stronger as time went.
on.

Then about three months later as I was having lunch with some business
associates I saw John Martin walk out of the Hyatt Regency in downtown
Baltimore. I felt the rage building in me.
I wanted to go over and confront him but I couldn't with my work associates
watching. So I did nothing. After lunch I began to wonder if he had or would try
to contact Marci. So being somewhat resourceful I called the Hyatt and asked if
John Maritn had checked in yet. The clerk was gone from the phone for a minute
and returned and said, "Yes. Mr. Martin checked in at
10:20 this morning."

I thanked the clerk and hung up the phone. He had just arrived so he would not
have been able to contact Marci yet. Now what should I do? Should I tell Marci I
saw him and warn her to say away from him. If I did that it would be saying I am
not going to trust that you can make the right decision yourself. If I do
nothing he may contact her and what happens if she goes to see him. That would
be the end of the marriage. I thought about what I should do all afternoon and
in the end decided to do nothing. If Marci couldn't stay away from him on her
own then our marriage was doomed anyway. I decided to wait and see what happens.

I didn't have to wait long. That evening the phone rang and I answered it. A
man's voice on the other end said, "Sorry, I must have called the wrong number."

I thought "That worthless piece of shit is after Marci again."  Right after
dinner I told Marci I was going out to work in the garage and she went about
cleaning the kitchen. The first thing I did in the garage was to remove the
mouth piece on the phone out there.  It was about seven thirty when the phone
rand again. I waited till the light went on indicating that Marci had picked up
the phone in the house, then I pick up the phone in the garage. As I picked up
the phone my heart was pounding so hard I thought Marci would hear it in the
house.  When I put the phone to my ear I heard his voice, "Hi Marci how are
you?"

"I'm sorry, I don't recognize your voice. Who are you?"

"It's John Martin."

"Why are you calling me? Haven't you caused me enough trouble already?"

"Listen. I need to talk to you."

"I don't think we have anything to talk to you about."

"What do you mean. I thought we meant something to each other."

"You know I have no idea how I ever got mixed up with you but it was the biggest
mistake of my life and I am certainly not going to make that mistake again."

"Are you saying you don't want to see me."

"That is exactly what I am saying. I want you to stay away from me and never try
to contact me again."

Then the asshole tried to stir things up. "Did you know that your husband came
to Chicago and
Had sex with my wife."

"Yes I know and it's very painful for me to think about that and if it you had
left me alone in the first place that never would have happened."

"Your blaming all of this on me now?"

"No. I made a very bad decision but I am not the one who started it. I didn't
call you. I never would have come looking for you."

"So your not interested in getting even with Ben and Janice?"

"Ben was right, you really are an asshole. When I hang up this phone I never
want to here from you again. When Ben comes in the house I am gong to tell him
that you called so that if you come anywhere near me you will have to deal with
him and I think Ben would love to hurt you. Do you understand me?"

"Yeah I understand. I just thought that..."

"Well you were wrong. Good bye." Then Marci hung up the phone.

I was so proud of the way Marci handle the asshole that I actually had tears in
my eyes.

I waited another forty five minutes before I went back into the house.  Marci
came over to me as I entered the living room and kissed me then she took my hand
and lead me to the sofa. She said, "I have to tell you something but you have to
promise not to say anything until I finish. Okay?"

"Okay."

"I just got a phone call from John Martin."

I couldn't believe that she was actually telling. I thought she would just act
like nothing happened. I said, "That son of a bitch."

Marci put her hand up and said, "You promised. Anyway he tried to get me to meet
him. I told him I never wanted to see him again. Then he tried to make me angry
by telling me about you and his wife. Bottom line is I told him that he is an
asshole and I never want to hear from him again."

I said, "I am surprised that you are telling me about this."

"I don't want to have any secrets form you. They can too easily be
misinterpreted and cause problems."

I kissed Marci and told her I was glad she told me. After that we went up to bed
and made love.

That all happened three years ago. Since then our marriage has been good. Marci
has been true to her word. She hasn't given me a bit of worry since that night I
caught her with the shit head. That is not to say things are perfect. I still
often think about what happened and without any way of understanding why, it
still brings me pain. I'd be lying if I said I had the same level of trust in
Marci now that I had before but I am happier with her than I would be without
her.